The Real Grinch

Christmas is hectic. Doesn’t it always seem to sneak up on ya?  My December days have been packed with everyday mom stuff and all that comes with getting ready for the holidays. I love decorating for Christmas. Since we moved into a new house, I had to figure out what I wanted and where to put it. I had to buy a new tree because my old one was too tall. I got new ornaments because my farmhouse vibe wasn’t working in the new place. I put the boys’ tree in the front room so that it could be seen from the street. It was filled with their school ornaments and some fun ones that represent them. This is about the end of my joy of decorating. Asher has destroyed everything. He has torn up the homemade ornaments. He has pulled off ribbons, crushed shatterproof balls, picked the flocking off of the bottom of the tree, and had so many pieces of my decorations in his mouth that I thought I would cry. I did-more than once.

He’s moved on to the gifts. He’s chewed on the corners of the boxes, pulled off ribbons, and shredded name tags. I didn’t even bother using tissue paper. I told Randy that I’ve almost just taken everything down. It’s frustrating. I don’t want this time to be anything other than normal. I don’t want the big boys to say that our house didn’t have Christmas because of their brother. So, I have a few days left to make it through before I get it all boxed up.

Luckily, we don’t have to go out of town for Christmas. Our family is all here.  It’s not fun. I dread it. There is so much chasing. Where is he? Did he just go out of the door? What’s in his mouth? I can never trust when anyone says, “We’ll watch him.” Their kind of watching is different from what he requires. I know we’ll leave the family Christmas Eve and he won’t go to sleep when we get home. It’s going to be a long night of him being wound up. It will be so late when Santa comes.  Oh, I’m such a great mom that Knox looks at me today and says, “Mom, I never wrote Santa a letter.” That crushed me.

There have been so many pictures on social media of you guys meeting Santa, seeing the lights, and setting up your elves. We drove Asher an hour away to sit on the Sensory Santa’s lap for a picture. He didn’t like it. He barely looked up. Not even a grin. It’s just really different for us. I feel like it’s getting worse as he gets older.

Pile on a week of a horrendous sleep schedule and the very next week strep hitting my house and you have my mood. If you didn’t get a card from me, don’t be mad. I only mailed about 1/2 of them. Some I hand delivered and some I put in mailboxes. I just couldn’t get it done. I know I’m not the only stressed momma of a special needs kid this time of year, but it doesn’t mean I can’t sulk. So, bring on the new year. I’m hoping for some breakthroughs and some peace.